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I don’t want to do this…I don’t want to cooperate…I don’t want to go…..

…..(I wrote this ahead of time)…..

…..at the time of this posting…I’ve probably been gagged & bound by my family…and carted to the hospital for the “procedure”…..

True to form…as much as we tried to keep things calm…up-beat…and copacetic…..

…..there was incredible/unbelievable trauma  & chaos which was unavoidable yesterday…..

…..and I don’t want to talk about it…..

…..(so much for keeping calm)…..

I was told not to take any “valuables” with me…(like my lucky rocks in Patrice’s pockets?)…..

…..so my reliable laptop is at home…that’s why I scheduled this post ahead of time…..

But…I did make “plans” in advance…..

…..like the Living Wills…and Directive-stuff…..

I’ve done all those…..

…..but…I had my own stealth-plans too…..

You know how your not supposed to eat or drink anything after midnight the day before a “procedure”…..

…..that makes good sense and I cooperated on that one…..

…..but my choice of my last meal before fasting…that…was done with intention and forethought and planning…..

I wanted to make sure that my daughters had meals that I’d cooked ahead of time…..

So…I made dishes of lasagne and chili…..

My older daughter pointed out that she was totally capable of making dinners for her sister and herself…..

…..silly me…I have them arrested in my mind as toddlers who are incapable of feeding themselves…..

…..that I would be leaving them to forage in the swamp for sustenance…if I didn’t plan ahead with prepared dinners…..

…..but I also had other odious plans for my last meal…..

…..my home-made chili…..

…..I know it’s childish…..

But I know how my body reacts to a meal that’s primarily made of beans…..

…..the timing’s right…..

…..for digestion…..

…..and I’ll be sedated…and unaware…..

…..and totally innocent…..

…..of bodily functions…and expulsions…(especially from beans)…..

…..!!!Fire In The Hole!!!…..

Like I said…..

It’s immature…and childish…..

Yes it is…..

…..(but it makes me feel like I have something to say about all of this)…..

 

 

 

 

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